Psycho-Cybernetics - See Yourself at Your Best
Matt Furey's Super Human Success Blog
Dear Matt,
Is there ever a time when I no longer focus on daily goals and put all my attention on big-time goals in the future?
Jack
Dear Jack,
There is not. Long-term goals come to fruition and bear fruit when you take care of today. If you stop taking care of today – you can forget about tomorrow.
Matt Furey
Psycho-Cybernetics.com
Click here to learn how to visualize better and travel The Path of Zero Resistance
Think for a while. Think hard if you dare. Do so with zest and zeal.
Then stop.
After you stop, your subconscious mind goes to work, nonstop, feeding you the best thoughts and ideas imaginable.
That’s how your mind works when you give work a rest.
Matt Furey
Recommended Books:
Psycho-Cybernetics, Updated and Expanded
Psycho-Cybernetics 365
It took a long time for me to learn this lesson. I would come up with a goal, get excited about it, then make the mistake of telling everyone about it.
But what a minute?
Isn’t announcing your goal to others one of the keys to making it happen?
It can be, if you’re talking to those who can and will support and guide you, otherwise it is often a monumental mistake.
One of the perils of announcing your goals to “everyone” is the fact that there are many who will feign outward applause and support while secretly hoping you fail.
These people will clap their hands and tell you that your goal is great, that your accomplishment will be a “slam dunk,” that you’re a genius and so on. Afterward, for some strange reason, all the wind that was pushing your sail along the seas reverses course and you feel disempowered.
This negative feeling lets you know that the creation you had in mind is being countered.
When you are an advanced creator, you can override the negativity of others. You can even use other peoples’ doubts and projections to propel your vessel forward.
But when you’re starting out, the unforeseen negativity can derail you. So you are wise to “zip the lip,” to only confide in those who are proven winners who want to see you succeed.
Over 30 years ago, I announced a goal I had to some people I was coaching. Afterward I sensed that my energy for the goal had been swiped. I was perplexed.
In a discussion about this situation with one of my clients, who happened to be a published author, among many other accomplishments, he said:
“It’s like you have all these invisible birds around you that are energizing you and giving you ideas, but as soon as you tell everyone about them, they fly away.”
If you insist on telling the world what your goals are, consider doing so silently as a test. Notice if the energy within you grows when you only tell those who you know are on your side.
Silence is golden, and for many good reasons.
Matt Furey
A big “thanks” to all of you who responded to the message shown below. I’ll be in touch with you next week regarding this event. For those of you who haven’t responded yet, here’s the information:
Want to create more, write more and be more – regardless of your age or any other factors? Well, I’m currently gearing up for an all-new Intensive – Creatively Writing for Your Life, and for More Life – with a brilliant friend who is waaaay older than me (I’m almost 63), and he has no intention of ever slowing down. He’s a role model for me, and I’m certain the two of us together over Zoom will inspire you beyond belief. Drop me an email at goals@psycho-cybernetics.com to get on the list to receive early bird information.
A few days ago someone told me he just learned how to recognize a psychopath.
The method is simple. You look at the forehead to see if there are any wrinkles. If there aren’t any wrinkles, the person has no empathy, and if someone has no empathy, he or she could be “nuts.”
Will this wrinkle-reading method apply to young children? I don’t think so.
And do wrinkles on the forehead prove someone is NOT a psychopath? I doubt it.
But in some cases, how you wrinkle up can be an indicator. For example, if you smile a lot, this can often show up as “crow’s feet.”
Determining who is good and who isn’t just by their wrinkles is an intriguing subject, and it’s not new. In Ancient China, the practice was called xiang mian (相面), or “face reading.”
There is also something called phrenology, the study of bumps on the skull and what they reveal about a person’s character.
Being a plastic surgeon, what did Dr. Maltz think about this subject. Not much.
Personally, I studied Chinese face reading over 30 years ago. I especially enjoyed learning that if you have protruding ears it is a sign of great musical talent and ability.
My ears protrude much further than the norm, and yet my musical talents remain latent. As for superstar musicians, I’ve seen plenty whose ears don’t protrude at all.
Another good one is whether or not you have prominent cheekbones, something frowned on in China but considered glamorous in the west. I looked at the cheekbones of our politicians. Some, such as Hillary Clinton, have bulbous cheeks – others, not much at all.
Then I looked at chins. A big chin supposedly means you aren’t sensitive to criticism and can “take one on the chin.” Jay Leno has the biggest chin I’ve ever seen, does that mean he is immune to criticism? Or that he can get struck with a prize fighter’s knockout blow and laugh it off?
It’s interesting and intriguing to learn about these ideas, but a much bigger factor, the factor that determines your future is your self-image – what you are picturing on the screen of your mind.
Altering and adjusting how you see yourself is the most important ball game of them all because the external is a reflection of the internal.
Focus on the inner and the outer will take care of itself. What your inner face says about you will show up on that outside, revealing what was on your mind.
Matt Furey
Dear Matt,
I have trouble getting myself to take action in a timely manner. Could you tell me how much time there should be between getting an idea and beginning to act upon that idea?
Polly Nader
Dear Polly,
A timely manner is somewhat rude. This means that as soon as you get an idea, you rudely interrupt whatever you were doing and put it in writing. Sometimes I do this mid-conversation. When an idea comes to me, there’s no time to waste because if you don’t at least record it – it will fly off, never to return. Once the idea begins to germinate and grow, I look at the smallest action I can take to get the ball rolling, and then I get after it. You can help this process along by snapping your fingers first – or by clapping your hands.
As a sidenote, I wanted to call today’s email “The Clap Effect” – but because “clap” could be misinterpreted I went with “snap.”
But clap is what I do. I clap loud and often, sometimes to the point of making my palms red hot. This isn’t necessary but I do it anyway because I enjoy the sound of fury.
It also comes across to me as though I’m getting applause for walking on stage to compete or perform. What am I going to do after the applause, just stand there doing nothing?
Use this technique and report back to me that you did it and it works. And if you don’t do it – there’s no need for a report.
Matt Furey
Want to create more, write more and be more – regardless of your age or any other factors? Well, I’m currently gearing up for an all-new Intensive – Creatively Writing for Your Life, and for More Life – with a brilliant friend who is waaaay older than me (I’m almost 63), and he has no intention of ever slowing down. He’s a role model for me, and I’m certain the two of us together over Zoom will inspire you beyond belief. Drop me an email at goals@psycho-cybernetics.com to get on the list to receive the early bird information.
Dear Matt,
I’m a perfectionist by nature. It’s part of being Japanese. But I’m frustrated as it takes me forever to get something done and put it out in the world for other people to enjoy and use. What is your opinion of perfectionism? Do you suffer from it?
Rui Sakamoto
Dear Rui,
There are five different ways I can instantly come up with to answer your question, but after I choose one way and tell you, I might feel that I should have also told you the other four, otherwise I didn’t do a perfect enough job answering you.
Oh well, here goes anyway.
Yesterday a client told me about creators whose primary focus is on the quality of something or the “perfection” of it versus those who focus on quantity. And guess what? Those who produce a larger quantity of something end up with far greater quality of that something than those who focused on quality alone.
When you focus on the quantity, the quality will go up organically and naturally without you being a perfectionista about it.
Matt Furey
A few years back I had a conversation with a man who told me he was, “Trying to keep up with the Joneses.”
I told him I didn’t think that was such a good idea.
“Why not keep up with yourself?” I said. “If the greatest athletes make themselves their greatest opponent, why not follow their lead?”
“What, you don’t think great athletes are competing against others?”
“Sure they are, but not completely. Competing against others isn’t their only measuring stick. They also use the most important measuring stick of them all, and that’s the one that tells you if you’re improving.”
“How’s that work?” he asked.
I said, “Well, if I used to run the 100-meter dash in 15 seconds, but over time I reduced my time to 14 seconds, then 12.5, then 10.8, and so on – isn’t that an accomplishment? Or should I only measure myself with Olympic Champion Usain Bolt, who ran the 100 in 9.58 seconds?”
“Uh, I never thought of it that way.”
“Most people haven’t, and that’s why they beat themselves up and tell themselves they’re no good,” I said.
“When did you first learn this?” he asked.
“My father first told me about when I was a college wrestler who desperately wanted to win. I didn’t get it. At all. But when I finally did, the weight of the world was lifted off my shoulders. I improved dramatically and victories over others got a whole lot easier. Then I forgot the lesson and had to relearn it. After I put it into play a second time, I didn’t need a third reminder.”
When I saw this man a few months later, there was something remarkably different about him. He was not only happier, he glowed.
“I’m doing much, much better,” he said. “I stopped comparing myself to the billionaires and focused on getting a little better each day in some small way. And it’s made a huge difference.”
Note that this man didn’t say he got “a lot” better each day. He focused on micro-improvements, which over time added up in a big way.
The other key words he used, “in some small way” are monumental game changers.
You cannot improve in some small way in everything each day.
A track star cannot run faster each time he trains or competes. But he or she can improve in other ways as there are always several important factors that go into the mix, and when you combine them they make the cake better.
If you don’t have a second measuring stick operating in your life yet – get one today. It doesn’t cost anything, and the payoff is huge.
Matt Furey
Recommendations:
Zero Resistance Living – the advanced course in Psycho-Cybernetics
Psycho-Cybernetics, Updated and Expanded – the classic 35-million copies best-seller
Psycho-Cybernetics 365 – a detailed daily exploration of the Psycho-Cybernetics classic by yours truly
Theatre of the Mind – my highly recommended audiobook on Audible – published by Nightingale-Conant
Dear Matt,
Got any words of wisdom for me today? Life is not going well for me. My car broke down. My A.C. needs to be replaced. And my boss even wants to fire me for talking too much when I should be, in his words, “Doing my job.” Everything is going south, including me. What can I do to turn things around?
Phil Abustah
Dear Phil,
In Psycho-Cybernetics Dr. Maltz warned about being overly-inhibited, of being afraid to speak up and make a mistake. This is for people who hold themselves back.
In your case, you could probably use a healthy dose of Inhibitchin.’ That would be the steadfast refusal to bitch, whine, moan and complain when keeping your mouth shut and having a smile-off would do you and others far more good.
Matt Furey
Yesterday I spoke with a man, Brian, who many years ago, had a goal to become a private pilot.
Brian had severe doubts about whether he could learn how to fly a plane. So he did something unusual to change the mental picture he had of himself.
He began to imagine that he used to know how to fly a plane, but forgot how due to amnesia.
So every day before training Brian would imagine what he used to know but had lost. Instead of having to learn something new that he perceived to be out of his league, in his imagination he was only relearning what he once had.
At the end of the pilot training, Brian’s instructor informed him that he was the best student he ever had. He aced the course and got his pilot’s license.
Brian focused on changing the picture that was flying around in his mind. And this change in imagery and scenery gave him “the wings” that led to his accomplishment.
Is there something you’re imagining you cannot do?
What would happen if you imagined you used to know how to do it – but forgot?
Now all you have to do is remember again.
Play around with this and see what wings you can come up with.
Matt Furey
P.S. For those of you who are writers or creators, or want to become one, I’m having a Zen Zone Zero Resistance Writing Intensive fairly soon. Interested? Send an email to: mattfurey@mac.com – I’ll have more information for you by tomorrow.
Q: Matt, I’ve heard that using a pen for at least 15 minutes per day can prevent Alzheimer’s. What’s your opinion of writing by hand compared to writing digitally on a computer? Does it make a difference when writing out your goals?
A: If you want to ramp up your cognitive abilities, you will want to write with a pen in hand as much as possible. To go a step further, put a pen in your non-dominant hand as well. And if you really want to glow your mind, write cursive forwards and backwards.
I first learned to write cursive with either hand (forwards and backwards) from Michael J. Lavery over 10 years ago. Turns out that this practice causes neurogenesis, sparks creativity and pushes dementia and Alzheimer’s away. There are plenty of studies, from 90-year old nuns to the elderly in Japan, that confirm this.
Manual writing in print or block letters doesn’t come close to writing in cursive, or what people in the U.K. and Australia refer to as “joined up” writing.
Cursive handwriting gets you into the Zone or flow state. Printing is “start-stop” thinking – not flow.
As for the writing of your goals, cursive is KING, just make sure you use a blue pen. The color blue is much more friendly to the brain.
The above does not mean one should never type. I do both – but much of my writing each day is done with a pen in hand, especially note taking and idea generation.
Always keep in mind that the pen is mightier than the word – which includes those written with Microsoft Word.
Matt Furey
Hello and welcome to Psycho-Cybernetics.com - the official site for the original (and expanded) teachings of Dr. Maxwell Maltz, author of the 35 million copy best-seller, Psycho-Cybernetics. I’m Matt Furey, author of the best-selling Nightingale-Conant audio book, Maxwell Maltz’ Theatre of the Mind.
When you subscribe to our Psycho-Cybernetics emails, I will immediately send you an email containing a FREE PDF ($100 value) of my Theatre of the Mind Masters Newsletter called Defeating the Failure Mechanism, which also features a Dr. Maltz piece, When Positive Thinking Doesn't Work. This highly regarded newsletter will show you how to apply the suggestions contained within it into your own life… and make changes for the BETTER!
Best,
Matt Furey
President, Psycho-Cybernetics Foundation
