Dear Matt,

I’m a perfectionist by nature. It’s part of being Japanese. But I’m frustrated as it takes me forever to get something done and put it out in the world for other people to enjoy and use. What is your opinion of perfectionism? Do you suffer from it?

Rui Sakamoto

Dear Rui,

There are five different ways I can instantly come up with to answer your question, but after I choose one way and tell you, I might feel that I should have also told you the other four, otherwise I didn’t do a perfect enough job answering you.

Oh well, here goes anyway.

Yesterday a client told me about creators whose primary focus is on the quality of something or the “perfection” of it versus those who focus on quantity. And guess what? Those who produce a larger quantity of something end up with far greater quality of that something than those who focused on quality alone.

When you focus on the quantity, the quality will go up organically and naturally without you being a perfectionista about it.

Matt Furey

A few years back I had a conversation with a man who told me he was, “Trying to keep up with the Joneses.”

I told him I didn’t think that was such a good idea.

“Why not keep up with yourself?” I said. “If the greatest athletes make themselves their greatest opponent, why not follow their lead?”

“What, you don’t think great athletes are competing against others?”

“Sure they are, but not completely. Competing against others isn’t their only measuring stick. They also use the most important measuring stick of them all, and that’s the one that tells you if you’re improving.”

“How’s that work?” he asked.

I said, “Well, if I used to run the 100-meter dash in 15 seconds, but over time I reduced my time to 14 seconds, then 12.5, then 10.8, and so on – isn’t that an accomplishment? Or should I only measure myself with Olympic Champion Usain Bolt, who ran the 100 in 9.58 seconds?”

“Uh, I never thought of it that way.”

“Most people haven’t, and that’s why they beat themselves up and tell themselves they’re no good,” I said.

“When did you first learn this?” he asked.

“My father first told me about when I was a college wrestler who desperately wanted to win. I didn’t get it. At all. But when I finally did, the weight of the world was lifted off my shoulders. I improved dramatically and victories over others got a whole lot easier. Then I forgot the lesson and had to relearn it. After I put it into play a second time, I didn’t need a third reminder.”

When I saw this man a few months later, there was something remarkably different about him. He was not only happier, he glowed.

“I’m doing much, much better,” he said. “I stopped comparing myself to the billionaires and focused on getting a little better each day in some small way. And it’s made a huge difference.”

Note that this man didn’t say he got “a lot” better each day. He focused on micro-improvements, which over time added up in a big way.

The other key words he used, “in some small way” are monumental game changers.

You cannot improve in some small way in everything each day.

A track star cannot run faster each time he trains or competes. But he or she can improve in other ways as there are always several important factors that go into the mix, and when you combine them they make the cake better.

If you don’t have a second measuring stick operating in your life yet – get one today. It doesn’t cost anything, and the payoff is huge.

Matt Furey

Recommendations:

Zero Resistance Living – the advanced course in Psycho-Cybernetics

Psycho-Cybernetics, Updated and Expanded – the classic 35-million copies best-seller

Psycho-Cybernetics 365 – a detailed daily exploration of the Psycho-Cybernetics classic by yours truly

Theatre of the Mind – my highly recommended audiobook on Audible – published by Nightingale-Conant

Dear Matt,

Got any words of wisdom for me today? Life is not going well for me. My car broke down. My A.C. needs to be replaced. And my boss even wants to fire me for talking too much when I should be, in his words, “Doing my job.” Everything is going south, including me. What can I do to turn things around?

Phil Abustah

Dear Phil,

In Psycho-Cybernetics Dr. Maltz warned about being overly-inhibited, of being afraid to speak up and make a mistake. This is for people who hold themselves back.

In your case, you could probably use a healthy dose of Inhibitchin.’ That would be the steadfast refusal to bitch, whine, moan and complain when keeping your mouth shut and having a smile-off would do you and others far more good.

Matt Furey

Yesterday I spoke with a man, Brian, who many years ago, had a goal to become a private pilot.

Brian had severe doubts about whether he could learn how to fly a plane. So he did something unusual to change the mental picture he had of himself.

He began to imagine that he used to know how to fly a plane, but forgot how due to amnesia.

So every day before training Brian would imagine what he used to know but had lost. Instead of having to learn something new that he perceived to be out of his league, in his imagination he was only relearning what he once had.

At the end of the pilot training, Brian’s instructor informed him that he was the best student he ever had. He aced the course and got his pilot’s license.

Brian focused on changing the picture that was flying around in his mind. And this change in imagery and scenery gave him “the wings” that led to his accomplishment.

Is there something you’re imagining you cannot do?

What would happen if you imagined you used to know how to do it – but forgot?

Now all you have to do is remember again.

Play around with this and see what wings you can come up with.

Matt Furey

P.S. For those of you who are writers or creators, or want to become one, I’m having a Zen Zone Zero Resistance Writing Intensive fairly soon. Interested? Send an email to: mattfurey@mac.com – I’ll have more information for you by tomorrow.

Q: Matt, I’ve heard that using a pen for at least 15 minutes per day can prevent Alzheimer’s. What’s your opinion of writing by hand compared to writing digitally on a computer? Does it make a difference when writing out your goals?

A: If you want to ramp up your cognitive abilities, you will want to write with a pen in hand as much as possible. To go a step further, put a pen in your non-dominant hand as well. And if you really want to glow your mind, write cursive forwards and backwards.

I first learned to write cursive with either hand (forwards and backwards) from Michael J. Lavery over 10 years ago. Turns out that this practice causes neurogenesis, sparks creativity and pushes dementia and Alzheimer’s away. There are plenty of studies, from 90-year old nuns to the elderly in Japan, that confirm this.

Manual writing in print or block letters doesn’t come close to writing in cursive, or what people in the U.K. and Australia refer to as “joined up” writing.

Cursive handwriting gets you into the Zone or flow state. Printing is “start-stop” thinking – not flow.

As for the writing of your goals, cursive is KING, just make sure you use a blue pen. The color blue is much more friendly to the brain.

The above does not mean one should never type. I do both – but much of my writing each day is done with a pen in hand, especially note taking and idea generation.

Always keep in mind that the pen is mightier than the word – which includes those written with Microsoft Word.

Matt Furey

Psycho-Cybernetics 365

The evidence is in, and it’s mind boggling.

All work and no rest makes Jack a dumb boy.

In Psycho-Cybernetics 365, I wrote about the power of learning “procedurally.”

I mentioned that you want to learn new things in chunks, in bits and pieces, and how anything you want to get good at doing is possible IF you stop practicing, studying or working the way most people are commonly taught.

In the past, I thought the secret of learning faster was cramming and jamming. I thought it was all about relentless pressure.

Then one day I learned how taking in information slowly, for short periods of time, followed by rest – was the fastest way to learn.

What???

I also learned that everything you want to learn is much, much easier when you associate what you want to learn with something you already know.

To do this you form a mental picture of what you already know (memory activation) and find how it is similar to what you want to know (the goal). Once your brain forms an association between the two, the speed of learning is amplified.

Once again, so much of learning is not about rote memorization or cramming and jamming; it’s more about mental imagery in a relaxed state. It’s about picturing, seeing, associating.

You makes some strides – then you rest. You do not push, push, push.

You learn-rest, learn-rest and learn-rest.

And it turns out that when you are resting, your brain isn’t. It’s replaying the information you “worked on” at 10-20 times the speed you were using while studying.

This brain processing is called myelination, which I also wrote about in Psycho-Cybernetics 365.

If you’ve been struggling to learn something, and/or if you’ve attempted to cram and jam a new self-image by eradicating dozens and dozens of limiting beliefs – STOP doing so.

Give yourself one idea, one new goal image to practice at a time and get it down. Then rest. Then the next idea, once again followed by rest.

Remember to take it slowly. Because the more you slow it down, the faster you learn.

Matt Furey

Here’s the link to Psycho-Cybernetics 365

When you picture what you fear, what you don’t want, you unconsciously and automatically stifle your breath and tense your muscles.

Q: Dear Matt,